This reads like it comes from The Onion — but it’s from The New York Times:

“If money isn’t loosened up, this sucker could go down,” President Bush declared Thursday as he watched the $700 billion bailout package fall apart before his eyes, according to one person in the room … In the Roosevelt Room after the session, the Treasury secretary, Henry M. Paulson Jr., literally bent down on one knee as he pleaded with Nancy Pelosi, the House Speaker, not to “blow it up” by withdrawing her party’s support for the package over what Ms. Pelosi derided as a Republican betrayal.

No time for wry comments. I’m angered by the bailout package in its current form. A banking rescue package is urgently needed, so why is Paulson dicking around with a package that does not sufficiently punish the shareholders of the banks. Of course it’s going to raise concern. And the democrats rebuttal to help homeowners? Ridiculous— and besides the point. The only issue that both sides should be focusing on is systematic risk. Period. Read my earlier post on “Bailouts for Dummies” to understand why a rescue plan is a necessary evil in the first place.